yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize
