The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Your cock deserves a montage
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
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