I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
