My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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