I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize
