I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
I need moral support for this bender
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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