Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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