Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
I enjoy the company of your penis
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
