Are we in a gay sports bar?
Please, let me fuck your mom
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
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