Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Come share oat with me in your robe
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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