forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
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