AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
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