I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
Randomize
