You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
I need moral support for this bender
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
