How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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