I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
