To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
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