I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Randomize
