is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Randomize
