Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize
