Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
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