Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
