I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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