Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
I intend to get homeless drunk
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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