I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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