would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
