he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
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