You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
Randomize
