if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
sarcasm needs its own font
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Randomize
