...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize