It's Friday. Sex?
just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
