We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
You need Xanax blowdarts
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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