I forgot how hot balto sounded
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
Randomize
