Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
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