Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
a search helicopter?!
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
Randomize