My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Randomize
