She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
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