I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
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