Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize
