break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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