she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Randomize
