Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
Randomize
