we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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