Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
party gras won. party gras always wins.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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