I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
