reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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