Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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