the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
Randomize
