Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
I'm determined to sit on that face.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
Randomize
