I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
