OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Randomize
